12 July 2010

Last Day in NYC

I realized looking back in my blog that I totally forgot about blogging the last day of our trip.  I'm blaming the heat.  It's gone to my head and fried my brain.

So here's a quick summary since we had a very laid back day.  The first thing we did Friday was we went down to the National Archives to find out some of my family history.  I wanted to know exact dates of when my mom and her family came into the US through New York.  I was able to find the ships manifest with the names of my mom's family that came to the US on that ship.  I also got photocopies of the manifest with all the typed up information showing my mom's age, passenger number, ethnicity, date of departure from Bremerhaven (Bremen, Germany) and date of arrival into NYC.  It was super cool.  This was a great addition to the family history my aunt had already gathered.

From there we took the subway to the Upper West Side to buy some H&H bagels to take home.  These are the best bagels in NYC.  They're always hot and fresh.  It was unusual to be handed a bag of fresh, warm bagels.  They're long gone now but they were oh so good.  We wandered around a little bit but knew we had to get back to Times Square.  We decided that we really wanted to see one more Broadway show while we were there.  After the awesomeness of La Cage Aux Folles, I was hungry for more.  Being big fans of Sean Hayes and Kristin Chenoweth and hearing the rave reviews about Promises, Promises, we decided that was how we were going to close out our NYC trip.

After a long afternoon of all of the above, we dragged ourselves back to the hotel for a few hours of R&R before heading to the theater.  The show was really good but La Cage was still way better.  Sorry.  I think that my reasoning for that is that I was laughing though about 90% of La Cage where it was only about 60% laughter through Promises, Promises.  I'm so ready to go back to NYC for another trip just to do more Broadway shows.  So here is the last bit of photos from our trip.

09 July 2010

Admitting Life's Imperfections

I try to spend as much time focusing on the positive as I can but it's not always easy.  I think it's easier to try to bury the things in our lives we can't fix than deal with them head on.  This is one of my big personal flaws.  I take on more than I should.  I burden myself with things I cannot control.  I'm pretty sure it's genetic.

Where am I going with this you ask?  The purpose of my blogging when I started it was to talk about the journey of adoption.  International adoption to be specific and the ups and downs of getting to the goal - our daughter.  I knew there were going to be lots of unknowns - birth parents, birthdate (Emi's is a guesstimate), health history, etc.  What I failed to realize is that this isn't just an international adoption issue.  It's an issue even in domestic adoption.  We are finding that out first hand.

Eriks birthdate and birth parents are known.  What gets tricky is medical history.  Even his birth mother doesn't even know her full medical history even after trying to get help from her mother.

This is where the admitting imperfection comes in.  Let me start out by saying this - Eriks is a very bright, articulate, athletic, sensitive, caring and beautiful child.  I love him for him.  When Lane and I adopted him, we had no idea what to expect and we are dealing with that now.  Eriks has always had a tendency to be impulsive - doing things and saying things before thinking them through.  This has gotten him in A LOT of trouble.  But after his teacher at school said something to us a few weeks into the Spring semester, did we consult with our pediatrician who referred us to a behavioral specialist (Dr. L).  This is interesting because he had a great Fall semester without any issues.  We're not sure what changed over Christmas break, but something did.  The pediatrician did not believe he had ADHD based on her observations.  After having Eriks tested, she was right.  He does not have ADHD.  But, what Dr. L. is seeing is behavioral problems and is beginning to lean towards an impulsive behavioral disorder.  She wants to speak to our pediatrician before she makes any accurate diagnosis.  In addition to doing and saying things without thinking about it she notices that there are 'twitches' he has which are common among people who have impulsive behavioral issues.  Dr. L. asked us about the other children Eriks' birth mother is raising.  Lane and I both said that they have been diagnosed with ADHD but we don't know details.  Dr. L. believes that the children likely have the same issues Eriks does and have been misdiagnosed with ADHD.  This is where the medical history becomes tricky.  We have a relationship with Eriks birth mom but not much.  It's definitely not one where I can call her up and ask her questions about the other boys to give information back to Dr. L.  This is frustrating because I don't have the answers and I want to make sure Eriks gets exactly what he needs to help him. 

I also have to admit that this entire adventure has been emotionally and physically exhausting.  You can't reason with a child who doesn't emotionally connect to consequences.  Don't get me wrong, he has a cow when he loses privileges or has some consequences to his actions but 5 minutes later, he's forgotten and doesn't care.  There are times he even says he doesn't care.

With all this being said, I am glad not only for myself, but for Eriks that we are going to find a way to deal with this.  Dr. L. has said as parents, we are doing everything right and that we are putting Eriks first.  She has had patients whose parents aren't doing what they should be doing for their kids.

I'll likely be blogging about our progress in the future.  I decided to share this because I know that Lane and I are not alone.  There are other parents like us.  Not only to adopted children but biological children.  If I can just share with one parent what we are going through, then I'm happy.

Peace and love.

06 July 2010

4th of July

This was Emi's very first 4th of July not only here in the U.S. but also as a citizen.  We laid low around the house most of the day and weren't really sure if we were going to go watch fireworks anywhere.  The prospect of finding parking and dealing with the crowds wasn't super appealing.  However, in the end, we decided what the heck.  This was going to be our final 4th of July here in GA.  This time next year, we'll be calling Indianapolis "Home Sweet Home." 

After having dinner at McDonald's (not our 1st choice but most of the places we wanted to eat decided they were going to be closed for the 4th), we drove over to Acworth and proceeded to walk from near downtown to Lake Acworth to watch the fireworks. 

There were a ton of people there but it wasn't as crazy as I thought.  They had a band playing some pretty good music so we were having fun on our blanket as we waited for the show to start.  Eriks and Emi did a bit of running around and playing.  The lady sitting behind us gave the kids small American flags to wave.  Pretty soon it got dark and they shot off one firework about 5 minutes until showtime.  What was funny about this is that a few blankets over from us this guy was laying down and had obviously dozed off.  Upon hearing the one ka-boom, we hear from the guy, "FIREWORKS!!!  Holy Sh*t!!"  When Lane heard the outburst he started laughing and continued laughing for about the next 2 minutes.  I don't really know why he thought the guys reaction was so dang funny but he did.  I started laughing at Lane. 

The show was pretty good.  Not the best fireworks I've seen but still entertaining and worth keeping the kids up late for.  We trekked back to the car and luckily dealt with no traffic because all the cars leaving were going the other direction!  Score!!  Put the kids to bed and had a beer.

Hope you all had a great 4th of July!!
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